I have just spoken to Sheela and we got onto
subject of book writing. She knows she’ll write a book and I found myself
telling her about Living Outside the Matrix – the book about true freedom that was never written –
and about the current desire to write a book on Letting Go of the Ego, because
everything that ‘gets in our way’ is ego-based, from wanting to help, to our
own insecurity to the more obvious desires for power and influence. So Sheela
suggested that I write NOW, a kind if One Woman’s Journey…. style blog. Just
for me. So I think that is what this will be (for now!)
Right now, I am demonstrating classic
ego-symptoms!! Fear (of lack) and insecurity. What does ego mean? Just means ‘self’
I think. So my thoughts of fear and insecurity are thoughts about ME. Very
different to self-ish… or is it?! I guess maybe after all, it isn’t that
different! Yes, I doubt anyone would say, using the word selfish colloquially, that
I am ‘behaving selfishly’ but I am thinking about myself.
“Whatever
you choose for yourself, give to another.
If you choose to be happy, cause another to be
happy.
If you choose to be prosperous, cause another to
prosper.
If you choose more love in your life, cause
another to have more love in theirs.
Do this sincerely – not because you seek
personal gain, but because you really want the other person to have that – and all
the things you give away will come to you.
…
If you give to another as a contrivance, a
manipulation meant to get something come to you,
your mind knows this. You’ve just given it a signal that you do not now have this. And since the universe is nothing but a
big copying machine, reproducing your thoughts in physical form, that will be your experience. That is,
you will continue to experience ‘not having it’ – no matter what you do!”
[p.17-18
Conversations with God, Book 3]
When I am thinking about myself (even when I don’t
realise it, like perhaps when I get feelings of fear) I am not allowing myself
to hear my wisdom.
I am feeling upset now, as I have got caught up
in the needing to know things, to understand; like how the 3Ps AND CWG can be
real when 3Ps states that we cannot cause anyone to be anything…. (eg. cause
another to be happy, as per CWG quote above). But D points out that these are
just words. That does feel right. Maybe ‘causing’ someone to be happy, prosper
or have more love is simply the same as bringing creative energy into the
world? And, more than that, bringing creative energy into the world that does
not have personal gain attached. Except, I guess, any loving creative energy
that anyone brings into the world, benefits all of us! And isn’t that just the
point? When ego is out of the way, collective benefit occurs. BUT, if that is
true, why does ego have to be out of the way? What is wrong with doing
something for individual personal gain? Because, if it’s true that when one
person benefits, we all do, what does it matter the motive?
Motive. Motive is thought? If thought is borne
from a low level of consciousness (low state of mind) and those thoughts are of
the nature of ‘motive’ what are the implications? The point is, perhaps, that
personal gain is so very often caught up, whether we are aware of it or not, in
low consciousness ego thoughts of fear or insecurity (for example) eg. I want
more money (because I am scared I won’t have enough to make me happy / show my
success / feed myself…)
However, if the motive-thought is truly high
consciousness (I am very unsure as to an example of this, because even if we
want to ‘help’, there is an ego-thought in there too - eg. I want more money so
that I can build a hospital in Kenya / …….) this is where the creative energy
becomes pure (loving) and universally beneficial.
